The Disagreement
A Roy Story
by GCS
A disagreement about Johnny's treatment of a victim leads to trouble for our two friends. This is Roy's side of the story.
DISCLAIMER: "Emergency!" and its characters © Mark VII Productions, Inc. and Universal Studios. All rights reserved. No infringement of any copyrights or trademarks is intended or should be inferred. This is a work of fiction. This story is only written for entertainment. No financial gain is being realized from it. The story, itself, is the property of the author.
I now know what it feels like to be a rag doll.
The blast sent me flying through the air and landing in a heap some twenty feet away in the middle of the large back yard.
In the back of my dazed mind my thoughts drifted to other flash over or explosion situations. Ordinarily my partner would have sensed it before it happened, and miraculously we would have escaped in the nick of time. But, sadly my partner wasn't here this time. We had a disagreement, a bad one, and as a result, he'd taken an extended leave of absence. That was a month ago. No one had seen him since. Hell, we didn't even know where he had gone. I miss him. I hope he'll come home soon.
As the fog cleared, I realized that my temporary partner might need my help, but it hurt too much to move.
I could hear the thudding against the soft grass as feet ran toward me. I could hear the fast breathing of my rescuer and then felt hands touching me. "You're gonna be fine."
"Jason?"
"Don't worry about him right now. Let's worry about you. Now what's your name?" Burt Dwyer asked me as he continued checking for injuries.
"Um...Roy." I gasped when pain reverberated from my leg where Dwyer checked it for breaks.
"Okay definitely broken." Dwyer tried his best not to hurt me. "Roy can you tell me where else it hurts?"
"Everywhere." I teased. I must not be that bad off if I'm still trying to make jokes. Actually, it made me feel better to tease. No wonder Johnny always does that.
Dwyer chuckled knowingly. "You've been hanging around with Johnny for way too long my friend. Could you pu-lease be a bit more specific?"
"My head, my leg, my shoulder, left..." Suddenly overcome with nausea I turned away. A few minutes later Dwyer was wiping my mouth for me.
"Okay buddy, what about your back?"
"Yes and my hip; like I said Burt...everywhere." This time I was not joking. I really did hurt everywhere.
Dwyer patted my uninjured shoulder and moved out of my line of vision. I could hear him talking to Cap, and then he was back. "Okay Roy we're going to get you on a board and then Brackett has ordered an IV. As I'm sure you already know I can't give you anything for pain."
"I know. Hey Burt."
He leaned over me to listen. "What is it Roy?"
"Ask Cap to call Jo for me."
That's the last thing I remember before waking up at Rampart with Dr. Brackett shining that horrible little beam of knife directly into my eyes. I hate that little light.
"Welcome back Roy." Brackett smiled down at me. I blinked several times until his face came into focus.
Dixie let out a happy sounding sigh. "Hey there sweetie. I'll let Joanne know you're awake." Then I heard the door swish and she was gone.
"Do you remember what happened?" Brackett was testing my neuro response.
"I flew, only not so well." I smiled up at him.
"Wait a minute. I think I have the wrong chart. I thought I had Roy Desoto as a patient." He chuckled at his own joke.
Just then I heard the swish of the door again and the clanging of the portable X-ray unit being wheeled into the room. I've heard it enough to know. Dr. Brackett gave orders to Malcolm for the pictures he needed and after telling me he would be back in a few minutes he was gone.
I hate X-rays. Malcolm tries his best to be gentle and not cause any additional pain, but truth be told that's impossible when you are as broken as I feel. He's a good man though and always apologizes when he thinks he's hurt me.
After he is done turning and positioning my broken bones he wishes me well and leaves me alone with my thoughts, which return to missing Johnny. Why did I push him so hard? It was one rescue, one stupid call. What made me think I was so much more qualified than he is? We both had the same training, and he did graduate first in both his trip through the fire academy and paramedic training.
He made one stupid little mistake and that was after he had half of the building fall in on him. He shouldn't have even had to help treat the victims, but there were so many of them that day. He insisted that he was all right to help. Cap and I had let him. Then I came down on him for that innocent little overdose he gave the patient. He just couldn't see clearly enough to measure it correctly. I should have noticed he was struggling. It hadn't even mattered in the long run she was fine. But I just wouldn't let it drop. No, not the infallible Roy Desoto. Now he was gone and no one knew for sure for how long or if he would come back.
He loves being a paramedic and by putting doubts in his head about his abilities, I may have taken that away from him. He always puts the victims first, no matter how injured he is himself. If only I had listened to him when he tried to explain how his vision had blurred and how he was having trouble thinking clearly. If only I had let him berate himself instead of doing it for him. He must have thought I didn't trust him anymore, that I didn't think he could do the job properly, and that he put the patients at risk. I would kick myself right now if it wouldn't hurt too much.
Joanne and Cap both tried to tell me it wasn't my fault. It was my responsibility to the patients to make sure something like that didn't happen again, but he was injured. They were just trying to make me feel better. I know Johnny he would have been much harder on himself than I could ever be about it, but I just wouldn't let it drop. Then he left. He didn't even tell me he was going. He just called headquarters and arranged the leave before he was even released from the hospital. He called Cap, but not me. As soon as Brackett signed his papers, he called a cab and left. I came by to offer him a ride home that day, but he was already gone taking with him my chance to apologize.
Dr. Brackett came back in the room bringing my thoughts back to the moment. "Well Roy it looks like you have a definite broken femur as well as a dislocated shoulder, several broken ribs, and a concussion. Thankfully, you do not have a skull fracture. We'll get you off that backboard and a little something to help you relax. Then up to surgery to have your shoulder put back in place and that break set. Then Dixie will get you settled in a room."
"Okay Doc. How's Jason?"
"He's next door with Joe, and it looks like he's going to be our guest for a while too." Dr. Brackett didn't really answer my question completely. There must be more to Jason's injuries than he wants to tell me.
"How bad is he?" I'll just have to keep asking until he tells me.
"Listen Roy, you need to relax and worry about yourself. Jason is in good hands." He unstrapped the backboard and slid it from underneath me. His eyebrow twitched and I could see the seriousness in his jaw.
"He's bad isn't he? Did he get burned? Come on Doc, I need to know." I'll beg if I have to. Johnny has nine lives, but the rest of us only get the one.
"Yes, he's burned, and he has a skull fracture. He's critical Roy." He sighed. "But Joe will do everything he can."
I closed my eyes and waited for Dixie to inject the miracle drug into my arm. I could feel the cold liquid slide into my vein and make its way up my arm. I hope it knocks me out. I don't want to think anymore.
Just as I start to drift, I feel soft lips press against mine. I crack open one eye and see my beautiful Joanne standing next to me. She's been crying again. I hate that about my job. I hate making her cry. "Hi honey."
"Oh Roy, I was so worried. It was on TV. I saw them loading you in that ambulance. I was terrified. They said one of you were critically injured and burned. I'm so relieved it wasn't you." Her hand went to her lips. "Oh I'm sorry. That must have sounded terrible. Jason is a good man. I didn't mean anything. I just…I'm just so happy you only have a few broken bones. No, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that to sound like that either." She rambled.
"Relax sweetheart, I understand. I love you too." I smiled to her. She smiled back. Then I drifted while she held my hand, and we waited for them to come take me up to surgery. I've done that for Johnny more times than I can count. Kept him company in the treatment room, waited for him while he had major surgeries and minor procedures, slept in the chair beside his bed when he didn't want to be alone, and took him home to my house when he needed looking after. But, when he needed me the most I let him down. I let my best friend down.
She kissed me again when they came for me, and promised she would see me when I woke up. I really do love my wife.
They wheeled my gurney down the corridor and I watched the lights flash by above my head. In the elevator, I could feel every sway and jerk of the car as it lumbered upward then stopped. The strong antiseptic smell blew across my face as the doors slid open to the surgery floor. Then we were in motion again and more lights slid by. They pushed me into a room, covered my face with a mask and told me to take several deep breaths and count backwards from one hundred. I don't remember how far I got.
I remember Joanne being there when I first woke up. I felt like a casted mummy, everything was encased and trussed up. My head hurt, my throat was dry, and my stomach felt like it was trying to turn inside out. She called the nurse to get something for sickness and pain for me. She's such a good wife.
When my eyes opened again, she was gone home to take care of the kids. Dixie was there checking on me. She always makes me feel cared for. She patted my shoulder and then my eyes closed again.
I felt someone beside me. It's kind of hard to explain, but I knew that feeling. It's like something that had been missing inside me had returned. I could feel the warmth of a hand on my arm and hear the soft breaths of someone in a deep sleep. I hoped I was right. I hoped I recognized the sound of those soft snores. I opened my eyes.
There he was. My best friend was there beside me with one hand on my arm and his head resting on his other arm draped across my mattress. He was sound asleep. I didn't know when he had gotten there or how he found out, but here he was. His hand felt warm, a little too warm I thought. His face looked a bit drawn and pale. I tried to slide my arm from beneath his hand so that I could feel his forehead for a fever, but it woke him up.
He lifted his head and stretched his neck, "Hey Pally."
"Hey." He called me Pally. Maybe he's not as mad at me as I thought.
"You banged yourself up real good this time." He scanned his eyes over my injuries. I'm sure he's already done that several times already. He probably read my chart too. "Doc said you'll be fine."
"I know." I needed something to drink. I tried to reach for the water. He beat me to it and placed the straw to my lips. The water felt so good going down. After several sips, I let the straw slide from my lips. "Thanks." He returned the cup to the tray. He was nervous. I could tell by the way he stood so still. Usually he had nervous energy, but when he really felt stressed, he became very quiet and still. It seemed unnatural, but that was John Gage, a mystery to me and everyone else. "Listen Johnny…"
He held up his hand to stop me. "No Roy. I'm the one who's sorry. I should have told you I was hurt worse than I let on. I just wanted to help, and I could have really screwed up. I did screw up."
"Where did you go?"
"Been camping." He coughed out his response. I know I heard some wheezing.
"For a month?"
He grinned at me. I've missed that goofy grin. "Well…first I went back to Minnesota. I thought maybe it was time to go back to the reservation."
"Was it?"
"No." His eyes turned sad again. "I can't go back there. I don't belong. I never did." He walked over to the window with his back to me. I knew the look he had on his face. I've seen it a million times, the one where he looks like a lost puppy, the one that always gets the women to fall for him. He coughed harshly then cleared his throat and continued his story. "Then I went up to the mountain to think."
"What did you think about?" I've gotten good at this over the past few years. I can get John Gage to tell me anything…eventually, and we needed to talk for such a long time. I couldn't let him clam up now.
"Things." He was trying to avoid telling me any more, trying to close me off. I couldn't let him do that.
"Johnny." I waited for him to turn to me. I knew he would. If nothing else to check me out and find out why I didn't continue talking. He moved back over to stand by my bed. "What things?"
"I needed to decide if I should still be a paramedic. I needed to know that you still trusted me. I couldn't face you Roy. I didn't even plan on seeing you. I just came…" He started coughing and wheezing almost not able to catch his breath.
"You're sick. You came because you're sick. God Johnny for you to come here to see the doctor without being forced, you must really feel bad." I tried to sit up. He put his hand on my chest to stop me.
"No Roy, it's okay. I feel like crap. But when I walked into the ER earlier Dixie just assumed I came to check on you. I didn't even know you and Jason were hurt. She rushed me up here to see you." He ducked his head. "I didn't tell her."
I reached for the call button. He grabbed my hand and nodded. "Johnny, you look and sound terrible."
"I was planning on slipping in here and getting some medicine and heading back out. I'm a coward." His shoulders slumped. He turned back to the window. "I could have killed that woman."
"You didn't." He didn't hear the door open when Dixie came in. "You were injured Johnny. If it was anyone's fault it was mine for not sending you directly to one of the ambulances and in here for help." I raised a finger to my lips to let Dixie know to be quiet.
Johnny remained by the window. Then he was assaulted by another coughing spasm. My eyes met with Dixie's and she understood. She ducked out of the room, hopefully to find Dr. Brackett or Dr. Early. "I don't know how to fix things." He whispered hoarsely.
"There's nothing to fix. Come home Johnny. I've missed you."
He turned around and looked at me to be sure I meant what I said. When he was sure I had meant it he smiled. "You have?"
"Yep." I smiled back. "And so have Joanne and the kids."
"I've missed them too."
I noticed that he swayed slightly. "Why don't you come back and sit down for a while."
Just as he started to walk back to the chair the door opened and Dr. Brackett came in followed by Dixie, "Hello John."
"Hi Doc." Johnny looked at me, then Dixie and then Dr. Brackett. His mouth opened then closed.
"Doc, I think Johnny is running a pretty high fever; he's coughing a lot, a deep harsh wet cough with wheezing, his skin is pale and clammy, and I think he's lost at least ten pounds." I went into paramedic mode on Johnny who lowered his head and closed his eyes making him sway more.
Dr. Brackett moved over beside him and took him by the elbow. "Okay hose jockey there's a bed right over here with your name on it. Dixie call downstairs and tell Joe to hold down the fort while we check out our friend here." She nodded and left the room. "Now while you strip down I'll get you a gown. I'll be back in a couple of minutes." Dr. Brackett left.
Johnny started unbuttoning his shirt. He looked up and smiled at me. "Thanks Roy, I really do feel bad."
I knew he must for him to admit it.
I also knew he was home to stay.
I didn't have to ask what he had decided up on that mountain.
Jason would get better in time, but the vacancy at 51's was taken.
My partner was back.
A little under the weather, but he was definitely back.
06/26/2010
